I took yet another one of those lovely personality quizzes today and it gave me shocking news. I'm the 'Girl Next Door.' Actually, according to this quiz, I'm a cross between the 'Girl Next Door' and the 'Progressive Girl.' Since I've been called the GND my whole life, I'm so much more interested in this progressive chick. It says PGs 'want the world to be a better place, but they live out their politics in a moderate left-of -center way.' Ok, I can deal with that. I did stage my own one-woman protest against the Rush Hour movies because they looked like complete coonage and I do have an adopted child through the Christian Children's Fund. Little Claudencia lives in East Timor and it's been awhile since I've made a payment, but that's not important. I'm living out my politics in a 'left-of-center way.'
It's this GND that pisses me off. We have way too much in common. 'She drives an American car' -- yep, I have a Ford Focus. 'She can talk for more than 10 minutes about her family traditions' -- I sure can, but that's only because my family's nuts. 'She owns any of the following: a Bible, her grandmother's engagement ring, scrapbooks or heirloom quilts.' Ok, I have a Bible. Three to be exact. And a scrapbook ... but I haven't worked on it since high school. *Groan* I guess I have more in common with the GND after all. Lucky me.
They always say that nice guys finish last, but the same is true for nice girls. All of us Girls Next Door spend our lives pining after the Boy Next Door, but he's too busy screwing the Girl Across the Street. And it isn't until after he gets the Girl Across the Street pregnant (or she gives him an STD, cheats on him, dumps him, etc.), does he realize how wonderful the Girl Next Door is. Brangelina is an example of that. Jennifer Aniston is good looking, smart, pleasant -- the perfect GND. She snags Brad Pitt and the world cheers. Then here comes a Girl Across the Street like Angelina Jolie and ol' Brad can't keep it in his pants. Now she's preggers and Jen is trying to drown her sorrows in Vince Vaughn. Yet another door slammed in the face of the GND.
In a perfect world, I'd be the 'Party Girl' -- the one who loves to drink and be merry. The only thing is I hate the club and bar scene, which should be evident from the fact that I'm sitting here blogging on a Friday night. Ah well. I guess I'll have to embrace my inner GND, as well as the progressive side of my personality. But there are several other aspects of my personality that can't be nailed down into one of these silly quizzes. I'm much too complex for one category. I may have a little Girl Next Door, a little Progressive Girl, and a tad of the Academic Girl, but I know one thing is true. I ain't no hollaback girl.