Friday, June 02, 2006

How to Annoy Me

It may be hard for many of you to believe, but somedays I get disgruntled. I can't always be the mellow, happy go-lucky person that I present to the world. Sometimes, things happen to me that make me want to rip someone's head off and stomp on the corpse. So here's my infamous list of my pet peeves. Note: This list is to be added to at a later date.
How to Annoy Me:
...Be Mr. Softee: I hear your music, Ice Cream Man. And so does anyone who lives in a five mile radius. You already have a dozen kids crowded around your decrepit truck, why do you need more? Do you really think that blasting that godawful song for 15 minutes straight in front of my window is going to attract more customers? Turn the radio off. Or I will .. but I'll bring a glock.
...Be the Mass Emailer: My friend Laura emailed me and a bunch of other people about her birthday plans. In response, I got emails from Shaleagh, Alison, Sean, etc saying that they couldn't wait to attend. The problem? I don't know Shaleagh, Alison, Sean, etc. I got an email from my friend AJ to say that he was engaged. Shortly after that, my inbox filled with other people's congrats. I guess it makes too much sense to respond to one person, folks want their messages spread through the world. 'Reply All' is the most awful button known to man. Anyone who presses it, should have their fingers chopped off one by one. I'm willing to be that butcher!
...Be the Nextel person: Either you have a cell phone, or a walkie-talkie. I want to make this a sign and shove it at my neighbor who keeps walking past window in walkie talkie mode. All I hear is a portion of his conversation, followed by BOOO-boo, that annoying sound that comes with the walkie-talkie function. That sound is the equivalent of fingers on the chalkboard for me. Next time I hear it, I'm liable to run from my house in my scarf and pajamas, ready to smash that phone into pieces.

That's it for now. I'm sure I'll have more input next week about things that piss me off. Until next time ....

1 comment:

boysidate said...

ooh. this is one of my absolute most favorite topics, things that annoy me!!! i just NEED to contribute. it annoys me when people speak with affected voices, like this is my sophisticated voice, then my valley girl voice, then my ghetto voice, i think you get it. nervous nellies. you sign up for a hike in the himalayas. then you spend the next 5 months freaking out about how difficult this is, how you're never going to be able to do this. blah, blah, blah. don't be a nervous nelly. people who say, can you cover me, i'll get you later. and they never get you later. they seem offended when you ask them to get you back. like you're some cheap ass. when in reality they are the cheap asses. you're just sick of being used. condescending know it alls who don't know jack. for example. i work with someone who makes up words that sound sophisticated, that actually don't exist. ok, sorry if this is stealing your idea but i love to tell people what annoys me. bye!