Wednesday, August 08, 2007

Out There, But In There

Well, I went 'out there' just like I said I would. And after a few weeks of being exposed to that world, I'm racing right back into my shell.

Actually, being out there wasn't that bad, even though I didn't do it to the fullest. I did learn that nowadays this meeting people thing takes quite a bit of discipline, confidence and LOTS of money.

I found this group that coordinates dinners between groups of professional men and women with the intention of hook ups. I thought that would be kind of fun to do once or twice. After all, a girl's gotta eat. I emailed the facilitator for more information about memerships. What did I learn? You can't just have dinners and pay as you go; you have to buy a membership package. And these packages cost $250 and up. Hah! Onto the next venture.

I'm still window shopping on Achoo! Personals and Hatch, with no real results. I did a brief trial of Achoo! and talked to one guy from there on the phone. That one conversation was enough to tell me he was a dud. There was a guy I was interested in on Hatch, so I sent him a wink, which is how you let someone know you're interested. He winked back, but I'm a punk and talked myself out of making the next move. I still haven't paid the fee, so I can't read any emails he may have sent me and this was quite a few weeks ago. It would really surprise me if he even still had a profile up there. Oh well.

In the online world, there are two types of fellas that I've been prone to attract: Mr. Separated and Mr. I'll Tell You Later. I think Mr. Separated speaks for himself. That's the guy who's separated from his wife, yet he'll express interest in me. Do me a favor, buddy -- get divorced, wait a year or two, then try to get at me. And then there's Mr. I'll Tell You Later. This is the kind of guy who'll avoid pertinent questions on his profile:

Age -- I'll tell you later.

Marital status -- I'll tell you later.

Do you have children? I'll tell you later.

I mean, really. If you're a married, 45 year old man with five kids. Just say so! I wouldn't be interested, but I'm sure there's someone out there who would. But that's an area so far from my expertise that I won't even go there.

The best part of this experience was the cookout I attended recently. I was there chatting with a male acquiantance when he suddenly said, "I like your profiles." I didn't know what he was talking about, I assumed it was myspace, since we are myspace friends. Then he proceeded to tell me that he'd seen me on Hatch and Achoo! and liked what I had to say.

This jarred me for a moment, but shoot, I'm not ashamed. If he's on there, he's probably having the same issues in the dating world as I am. We began comparing notes on what we've got from each site and we've both had similar experiences. It seems like there's no easy way to navigate this wonderful world of dating. It's just so darn frustrating. Sigh. But I'll keep at it for now and let ya'll know if there's any progress.


mlle smith said...

You know, back when I was in NYC (like the sound of if it were so long ago :0) I used eHarmony once. It sucks to use it during the holidays because no one is really keeping up with it during that time.

But, outside of the Christmas season, eHarmony rocks. ROCKS. The two guys that I decided to meet from that site were very compatible with did not work out between us for other reasons...but the basic compatibility was there. Ten-hour marathon phone calls, and all.

I didn't like Match, at all...and I'm nearly positive that I would not have had the patience for the other sites. eHarmony is the only one that I'd ever recommend. :0l

Also, the people on eHarmony pay money to become members...and they're usually very serious about searching for that special someone.

Strength/Courage/Wisdom said...

I haven't had any bad experiences with Match. I thought about doing eHarmony, but they have soooooo many questions that it was intimidating. I felt like I was taking the SATs all over again! Maybe I'll check it out sometime in the future ... once I get motivated again! Thanks for the advice!