Tuesday, May 01, 2007

The Naming of the Vaginas

The problem with being enrolled in a creative writing program is that you always have that one chick who wants to write about her vagina. In my class, this person is Darlene.

Throughout the semester, we've listened as Darlene detailed various stories with her vagina being one of the main characters. Already, her vagina has been tired, happy, energized, depressed and overworked. Luckily, this is an all-female class with the exception of the professor, who squirms in his seat everytime Darlene gets up to the mic. Believe me, there's nothing harder than trying to keep a straight face when you're listening to a story rooted in genitalia. Somehow, we've managed.

Another classmate, Becky, took issue with Darlene's subject matter. The two women are friends, so she confronted her in a light hearted manner:
B: "Darlene, I'm so sick of your vagina I don't know what to do!"
D: "Hey, I'm just being artistic."
B: "Whatever. Does your vagina have a name? 'Cuz if not, I'm gonna name it."
D: "And what would you call it?"
B: "Becky."

And that's when I stopped listening. It's one thing to name your own vagina, but it's a whole 'nother thing to name someone else's after yourself. Oh heavy sigh. Now I can't figure out who's more disturbed. Becky or Darlene.


MotownRunnerGirl said...

that's weird.

Strength/Courage/Wisdom said...

Shoot, you're telling me! It's bizarre.

Mlle Smith said...

I know it sounds crazy, but whenever that one person at the poetry slam begins singing the praises of their vagina, I immediately assume they're gay, or in denial. I also assume the same if a man constantly chats up his penis.

This includes rappers and potential dates.

I loved Eve Ensler's Vagina Manologues (the book).

Strength/Courage/Wisdom said...

I never thought of it that way, Mlle Smith. When a guy does it, I would automatically think he's compensating for something that's lacking in his package. For a woman, I just don't think anything one way or the other.

I didn't read Eve Ensler's book, but I liked the play.

Juicy77 said...