Monday, August 11, 2008

White Men Can't Jump, Black Women Can't Swim


I can't swim.


Some of you are surprised. Your mouths are agape, eyes popping out of their sockets. What adult can't swim?? It's soooo easy! I know your thoughts. Believe me, I've heard it all before.


But there are those of you who understand what I'm going through. I'm a black woman. And that means I do NOT want to get my hair wet under any circumstances. (It's somewhat easier with natural hair, but it's still a challenge) Then I have this general discomfort of being in a bathing suit and exposing myself to a bunch of strangers. Plus, I wear contact lenses. If I were to get in the water -- dunk my head underneath and everything -- I'd either have to take my contacts out, or where goggles.


This summer, I went on a vacation to the Caribbean that made me want to change my ways. I spent five glorious days in St. Martin, where I spent alot of time in my bathing suit, on the beach or in the pool or the ocean. Because I can't swim, my exposure to the water was limited to jumping over the waves, drinking champagne in the kiddie section of the pool, and having a gentle splash fight, that managed to keep my hair mostly dry.


I returned to the states wondering what it would be like to actually learn how to swim. So I signed up for beginner swim classes at the new 'Aquatic Center' near my home. They start soon, and I already have a pair of goggles to protect my lenses. (I hope they work!) I haven't been able to find a swim cap yet, but I may have to go for drastic levels. If I can't get a swim cap in time, I'll braid my locs up and shroud them up with a scarf and no less than two shower caps. Think I'm playin'. This was enough to save me when I got baptized.


But let me not forget to add the most worrisome part of this upcoming swim class. The adult/beginner lessons are open to people aged 13 and up. I can't wait to be surrounded by teeny boppers!

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

"drinking champagne in the kiddie section of the pool" LOL! I can see it now. :o)

...they call me "L" said...

Girl, get your swim on. I don't do it nearly enough, but I love to swim, wet hair or not. I understand the perm/pressed reason behind many of us hating to get our hair wet, but with natural hair, what's the issue? Good luck finding that swim cap, but even if you don't, don't let that stop you from learning!

Strength/Courage/Wisdom said...

@Juicy: Yes, it was quite hilarious!

@Tha L: I can't wait to get in the water! I'm thinking I may only have hair problems on day 1 of class, since I have to go to a party soon afterward. I don't want to have woolly locs. Sigh.

Anonymous said...

I can't, either. Don't feel bad. A lot of black women can't. I learned, but the skill has escaped me now, lol. A friend tried to sign me up for swim classes once, and I refused. I need to get back on it, though.

Eb the Celeb said...

Well its a good thing you are going... I know how to swim because my mom did ever thing to keep us out of the house during the summer so we went to camp, took swimming lessons, was in the track club, the list goes on... anything to keep us out of her hair... but I cant even remember the last time I went swimming though... hair being the reason

MangoButtahQueen said...

I miss swimming...being originally from an island (Hawaii) I miss being in water I can see through...eventually I hope to go back just for the beaches...